A hypothetical ad which may appear in a classified column in the near future if India continues to be India
A major political party in India is seeking a politicians.
1. Should be Gandhi (not a Gandhian).
2. If not, should be from a minority community. People from both religious and caste minorities welcome.
3. Should be fit and agile to dodge shoes.
4. Should be flexible enough to change sides if they are offering a seat in the ministry by opposition party.
5. Should know how to bribe voters without being caught on tape.
6. Should be in the age group of 45-50 to apply under youth leader category, to apply under general category should be older than 70.
7. Should have at least 4 criminal cases registered under your name. (bragging rights).
8. Should excel in war-mongering.
9. Should not have studied anything more than a BA and in case you mention PhD or MA or London School of Economics, they better be a lie!
10. Last but the least should be thick-skinned.
Yesteryear film stars may also apply*